Tooth Fairy

Every child dreams of what they want to be when they grow up, at least I know I did.

Some of my earliest memories involve running around pretending to doctor sick animals, drawing up pretend house plans or arguing against someone in the court of law… that also doubled as my bedroom with bunk beds.

Chasing dreams can be tiring and trying to figure out what you want to do with your life in four years is even more exhausting. I flipped back and forth between different majors and, being the planner that I am, would plan my life to a T every time I chose a new one.

I love to write, I thrive off pleasing people and I fit right in at the communications college at Alabama. I loved my classes and my professors and I excelled in many different aspects of PR. What they don’t teach you is the fun things that you do in class, don’t always exist in the real world. At the age of 19, I wasn’t able to rationalize (believe it or not) the things that I can now. I didn’t understand that moving back to my hometown would limit the ‘fun’ parts of a communications job.

I wish I had a dollar for every friend I’ve spoken to that’s graduated with a marketing or communications degree in the last five years and has gone through this same struggle. Huntsville has many amazing jobs for people in the communications field, and for every one job their are 20 people to fight for it.

So, in 2013 I started to fight all the really big fish in a pretty small pond. I tried to fit the mold of a bubbly public relations princess for years without even truly knowing what that involved. I had my elevator speech rehearsed when people asked me why I decided to major in PR.

I’m organized and I pay attention to detail. I love working with people and helping them meet their goals. I love all things that communications involves; like writing, advertising, graphic design and media. 

And this really wasn’t a pitch. I LOVE to read and write everything I can get my hands on. I’m enthralled to watch something click when teaching someone, or helping them through a difficult task. I LOVE people and I’m so organized that it’s borderline OCD.

So, why did I feel so empty chasing numbers for companies? I bounced from job to job with organizations that I whole-heartily believed in and I still felt empty at the end of a long, hard days work. I reasoned with myself that you don’t HAVE to love your job. It’s an ends to mean and I figured I was just adjusting to full-time work life. Not that I haven’t had some serious soul searching going on for the last few years but adding to the fact that I couldn’t find my niche in my own world was adding to the pain.

Even then, I continued to pray that God would set me on the path for His will and not my own. This has been a theme of mine for the last year and I don’t hate it.

After researching so many different avenues, I finally realized my common theme of wanting to help others. Every time I started to doubt myself or the idea of returning to school my mother would remind me that I was into the business of helping people and that it was obviously what my heart was called to do. I really wanted to work with people in some type of medical atmosphere.

By the time three different people had mentioned a dental assisting school in Huntsville to me, I figured it might be worth looking into. I did my research and talked to my family, but the idea of going back to school on the weekends seemed more overwhelming than not.

When in doubt over the last year, I’ve learned to pause and pray. And that’s what I did, I prayed about it. 

I was leaving work one night and headed to Cove Church where I help out with the high school small groups. I prayed for a sign. As petty as that sounds, I asked God for a sign to know that I wasn’t being impulsive and making a mistake. The idea of school and the timing seemed to be lining up, but I wanted to know that God had part of this in His plan for me.

I arrived at church a little late that Wednesday and sulked over to where the leftover pizza was sprawled out. Halfway through eating my feelings I started chit-chatting with a fellow small group leader that I had talked to half a dozen times before. On this particular night she happened to ask me where I worked. Hesitant to bug her with my issues, I decided to let my guard down. I told her and mentioned that I was on the fence about going back to school. Around that same time I happened to notice her pretty purple scrubs. We continued to talk and she told me that she was a dental hygienist, but had started off as a dental assistant. I asked all sorts of questions and she was eager to answer. I hugged her neck before we sat down for the sermon and I definitely had tears in my eyes. You know the really happy, warm tears. God definitely spoke to me through her that night. He knew I needed confirmation and reassurance and He made sure that I got it.

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I’ve finished my certified course and landed a job in an amazing office. It could not have been orchestrated any more perfectly. It’s amazing the ways that God will truly reward you when you seek him with all your heart. It’s been scary to change careers COMPLETELY at the age of 26 and I’ve never felt more sure about anything before. I’m so thankful that I was able to continue chasing my dreams, even if this one was super exhausting. It’s well worth it to be in fearless pursuit of what sets your soul on fire. Here’s to never settling.

 

Love Triangle

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23

I don’t think there will ever come a day when I am not blown away by God’s mercies and the second chances that I have been given.

Despite the way I strayed from God for so many years, the second I turned my heart in the right direction I was blessed in more ways than I can count. I still cringe at some of the things I’ve been through, but I wouldn’t take any of it back. Every thing that I’ve been faced with has brought me right here. Exactly where I’m suppose to be. God never gave me more than I could handle, even if I thought it might kill me! It wasn’t fun, but it taught me a lot and made me so grateful for the little things that I took for granted before.

I constantly ask for advice, even if I rarely take it. This past year I received three very important tidbits of advice. I’m 100% sure that they will stay with me for a lifetime.

I am fortunate enough to help co-lead the most wonderful group of 11th grade girls that teach me about love, life and God on a regular basis. Our small group leader reminded them one day to make sure their significant other’s name could fit into 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

Is Adam patient, is Adam kind? Does he envy, does he boast, is he proud? Does he dishonor others, is Adam self-seeking, is he easily angered, does he keep record of my wrongs? Does he rejoice in truth and stray from evil. Does Adam protect, trust, hope and persevere.

The first time I heard Amanda say this, I couldn’t help but smile. Not only was I happy that our girls were getting such amazing advice at 16 and 17 years old, but my heart knew that Adam fit the mold for every single verse.

[[Side note: he’s going to HATE that I’m writing all about him, but he subjected himself to that when he asked me to marry him.]]

Another wonderful piece of advice I received this year was to lay your silver down so you can pick up your gold. I obviously dated people before meeting Adam, and most of those were very unhealthy and trying relationships. I wouldn’t ever wish that upon anyone, but every single moment prepared for meeting my future husband (EEEEEK! that’s still exciting to say) and I definitely can’t complain about that. When I walked away from unGodly relationships and situations and isolated myself with prayer, Adam showed up with more patience and kindness than I knew what to do with. I will always be grateful for the way he chased me and the way he loves me, it’s more Christ-like than he realizes.

The last piece of advice I received was probably the most important. “Take this season to walk with Jesus. Just you and Him.” And that’s exactly what I did. Never underestimate the power of prayer and God’s word. Scripture can fit your season of life so perfectly when you open up your bible and read it. The moment I opened my heart to God, I was presented with the most wonderful man that God hand-picked just for me. It’s the most romantic love triangle I’ve ever witnessed.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. Ecclesiastes 3:11

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Cleaning My Plate

I love to eat. I have ALWAYS loved to eat. To this day my mom brags about how I was such a good little eater. I’ve never passed up food, especially sweets, and I get hangry if I skip a meal. Just the facts, y’all.

I am also notorious for loading up my plate with more than I can handle. My stomach is NOT as big as my eyes, or willpower for that matter. Last year I found myself in the perfect situation to be as busy as possible. I loaded my plate up.

I was encouraged when I felt down to do something with hands or volunteer my time. So, that’s what I did. I bought a few dozen books to read, I made new friends, I joined new groups, I made my list of 100 things, I started working out more, I volunteered for everything I came across and I said yes to everything that everyone needed.

It didn’t happen immediately but sure enough, the happiness that I had worked so hard to take back was slowly slipping away to worldly busyness.

I’m not saying that I’m the busiest person in the world. I know some people are reading this and rolling their eyes thinking of all the things they do before I’m even out of bed in the morning. But I know when I make myself so busy that I forget to glorify God in my actions, that I’m not living my life the way that I want to.

The bible says, “be STILL and know that I am God”.

If I’m not taking time to be still and spend time in the word, then it’s easy for me to see where the problems with my peace have started. The second that I redirect myself to put God first and actively make him my first appointment in the morning, happiness comes so much easier to me. I’m just all around a more pleasant person with some Jesus in my life.

These last few months I have made a point to finish some task on my plate and not pile something in it’s place. It’s weird, and it makes me feel like there are a million things that I’m forgetting. To be totally honest, I think I’ve caught up on TOO MUCH rest – which you will not hear my complaining about any time soon.

This doesn’t mean that I’ve become a hermit and don’t enjoy doing fun things anymore. I just think twice before I say ‘yes’ to something that isn’t a priority right now.

At the end of the day I know that I’m feeding my energy into things that can give back to me. My faith, family and health are much more important than any worldly satisfaction that I can invest my time into.

iY

This blog is going to seem very bizarre coming from a chick born in 1990.

I can no longer count on two hands the amount of times Millennial jokes have been thrown in my direction since I entered the workforce almost 3 and half years ago.

Millennials have the attention span of a gold fish. We’re contributing nothing to society. We don’t know how to work hard. We’re narcissistic and entitled… We get it, we get it.

Recently I was introduced to the idea of Generation iY, which is specifically people my age and younger.

According to Leadership NowGeneration iY is the younger group of Millennials born after 1990. Our world has been defined by technology and shaped by the Internet— iPod, iBook, iPhone, iChat, iMovie, iPad, and iTunes (thanks Apple!)—and for many of us, life is pretty much about “I,” says Tim Elmore in Generation iY.

I always found statements like this offensive. I was raised to be selfless and to serve others. I give when I have extra to give and always try help others who ask for it. I make an effort to not stray too far from those teachings, but I also don’t feel the need to flaunt it very often. I think that’s where I differ from other girls my age and I’m A-Okay with that.

I’m not saying that my Facebook and Instagram aren’t polluted with pictures of my boyfriend and adorable four-legged child. I would be lying if I said I didn’t take pictures to remember things on a daily basis. Especially when I cook something that turns out halfway decent because Lord knows that THAT is a miracle.

I. Love. Pictures.

But I think I’ve begun to notice the difference in enjoying the moment and ruining it with a 15 minute photo shoot to get the perfect shot just to see how many people will ‘like’ it.

I have a select handful of friends that I’ve kept around for more than a decade, and they will probably read this nodding their heads and smiling. However, I made it my goal this past year to make new friends and put myself out there. I quickly discovered that Generation iY is the real deal.

I have been in situations where I’ve missed the band playing because it was more important to try and get the perfect picture. I’ve worn coordinating and matching outfits for the sake of good pictures. I’ve witnessed people complaining while serving with a church and then posting a picture a few hours later about how great it was to serve as the hands and feet of Jesus.

This hasn’t really sat well with me.

I want to be so busy living my life to glorify God that I forget to take pictures. I want to be forced to discuss happy memories with friends and family. I want to work hard to be the light in the world and forget that my phone is in my purse. I want to detach from the technology aspect of being social and actually be social.

So, this is my vow. I want to drop the i from my Y. Here’s to taking less pictures of myself and more of beautiful things that God has created for us to enjoy. Here’s to remembering that even if it’s not on Snapchat, it still happened. Here’s to looking at those I’m at dinner with, instead of taking pictures of my food. And here is to enjoying the beautiful people that God has gifted me with.

 

Flight Risk

I am constantly asked about the phrase I have tattooed on my foot. My 18-year-old self would have never believed that it would be a gateway for me to share scripture with random strangers. Nowadays the cursive wording on my foot has a much different meaning than it did almost 8 years ago.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 1 John 4:18

I have never been one to drop my walls and easily let people into my life. Even when picking friends, everyone must go through a filter. I have made an art out of tucking my tail and running away from people at the first red flag. It made me feel stronger to walk away and it definitely left everything within my control. It’s way easier to leave before you’re left. Who doesn’t want to be the heart breaker and not the heart broken, am I right?

The more my teenage views evolved and the more I strengthened my relationship with God, this verse I have inked on my foot took on a whole new meaning. When I was 18 it was a reminder to not fear love and that reminder never seemed to help. Now I know that it means only God’s perfect love can drive out fear that so many others have helped create. I have been through relationships and friendships that have made me very weary of loving people or even letting people love me.

** Here is where I remind you super cute high schoolers to really do your research before tattooing your body! I still love my tats and think I made good choices, but your taste is going to change. Choose wisely! **

My verse is now a reminder to wait for the guy that loves me the way that God intended him to. To wait for the guy that thinks my flaws are gorgeous and my annoyances are blissful. For the guy who wants to lift me up instead of tear me down. For the guy that helps calm me instead of picking a fight with me.

I don’t expect love to be perfect, but I do expect the perfect love that God has planned for me to chip away at the mountain of fear I’ve let cover my heart.

It’s A Hill. Get Over It!

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In 2012 I ran the Cotton Row 5k as my very first race and I fell in love.

It was only fitting that my first 10k would also be in 90 degree weather through the streets of downtown Huntsville. While I was probably singing a different tune Memorial Day morning, I wouldn’t want it any other way… now that it’s all said and done.

Cotton Row is a beautiful course that cuts through the neighborhood that I grew up in and comes down the back side of Huntsville’s “mountain”. Naturally, the first 3 miles of the course are up hill through the quiet backroads of Blossomwood that lead UP Monte Sano.

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Of course, I’m chronically analytical and I couldn’t pass up the chance to see the symbolism in getting over the hill during this particular season of my life. For the past year  my world has been nothing short of a uphill battle. A very steep, rocky hill not unlike Mountainwood Drive. Sickness, sadness and shortcomings have clouded my happiness and I had to choose joy or choose defeat.

Despite how bitter this year could have made me, I’m closing 25 out with a bang. My friends and family will gladly tell you my glow is back and my smiles aren’t so spaced out anymore. That didn’t happen without some hill work. Turning your life upside down and struggling to come up for air is terrifying – but it can also be a beautiful chance to start over and not take things for granted.

Choose joy and be kind, everyone around you has their own hill they’re trying to climb. But once you get over it, the back side of the course is a breeze.

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Lose the Battle, Win the War

The first time I heard a sermon on spiritual warfare I was attending Church of the Highlands for the second time as a guest. If you don’t know about COH, do me a favor and go to a service – it’ll change your life.

I remember the knot in my throat when Pastor Chris announced the topic for that Sunday in September. Whyyyy were we talking about spiritual attacks?! We’re talking like The Exorcist? WHY WAS THIS MAKING ME SO UNCOMFORTABLE?? The Devil was trying to attack me? Cool story – ignorance is bliss and I was going to play dumb for the REST of my life!

God placed me in that high school auditorium for a reason. I was meant to hear that sermon and I needed to hear that sermon during that season of my life. It might have taken me these past nine months to realize it, but I heard about spiritual warfare 2 weeks before my happiness was attacked.

I had been seeking out God, settling into a new church that I loved, getting involved with a small group. The happier I became the more I realized my happiness was being stolen. I was a walking example of Murphy’s Law, anything that could go wrong had gone WAY wrong… over and over.

You don’t have to acknowledge spiritual warfare, it’ll still find you. When your plan aligns with God’s plan, the amount of peace that will flood your soul is a feeling that can’t be put into words. You’ll finally feel like you can see God’s plan for you and joy will come in abundance! And the enemy will try to drain that from you.

It might be so small that you don’t even notice it. You might just back into someone’s car and have to tap into your savings account. You might find out your fiancé cheated on you. You might find out you have a tumor at the base of your brain. Everyone’s battle is different and everyone’s battle is equally stressful.

In these moments it is so easy to become bitter. It might even be easy to blame or question God, especially when everything was just going so well. Peace will return when you realize that your emptiness, your dread and your pain are BECAUSE you’re on the right path.

When you start to feel that everything in the world is against you, keep pushing – you’re doing something right. That’s not an easy feat, but the outcome will be well worth it.

I would rather be the girl that makes the Devil say, “Oh, snap” when my feet hit the floor in the morning, than the girl who allows trouble to rock her faith.

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.2 Corinthians 4:17

Trip Around the Moon

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The first few months of a relationship can be intoxicating.

Constantly checking your phone for a text message, getting butterflies before first dates and staying up late on the phone giggling like a 13-year-old. Before you realize it your world has slowly started to revolve around them. You’ll spend hours trying to explain to this person how much they mean to you and feel like your words aren’t doing you any justice. While this love sick act is usually just plain sickening to others, it’s nothing short of perfect to fall for someone. Your happiness will start to line up with theirs and honestly, sometimes that can be THE worst. And then there’s the case when intoxicating becomes just plain toxic.

You spend weeks, months or even years trying to build this person up. The more you pour into this person, the more empty you begin to feel. Sooner or later you realize that you’re not getting a fourth of the love your giving and love for others and love for yourself will eventually run out. Falling for someone is great… until you realize that they aren’t there to catch you.

Sound familiar to anyone?

Your honeymoon phase comes crashing to the ground after a quick, ‘I love you to the moon and back’ trip and you realize this person you’ve opened up to doesn’t love you like you like they let on. So, what happens when the moon and back isn’t that far? Falling in love isn’t so great anymore, is it?

It’s so easy to become bitter when someone hurts you. Trust me, I’ve made an art out of keeping people at a distance and running at the first sign of cold feet. It’s easy to shut guy after guy down and push people away. If you don’t let anyone close enough to you, there’s no chance that you can be hurt. That’s the pitiful lie that I let myself believe.

While many guys will come and go and do lots of damage along the way, the right guy will be able to pick up all the pieces and help you glue your heart back together.

At times it will seem that being single and hardening your heart is obviously the best option, but don’t lose hope. I’m here to tell you that while it may seem easier to keep your heart closed off, it’s no way to go through life. We weren’t meant to go through life alone – it’s actually worse than letting your heart be broken! Friends and relationships make our time on Earth worth living. I would rather put myself out there and be knocked down over and over again, than end up alone because I was too afraid of being hurt.

I’m not advocating running out and giving your heart to the first guy you meet but don’t close your heart off to love either. Be careful when you chose a new friend or a new guy to date. Your timing is nothing compared to God’s timeline for you and when He’s ready the right guy will make you realize why all the other ones didn’t work out.

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” Romans 12:12

Forget what hurt you, just don’t forget what it taught you. People come and people go for a reason. When someone slams a door in your face, be thankful that God is protecting you from something you didn’t even know you needed to be protected from. When the moon and back isn’t that far, be grounded in faith.

Daughter

Testimonies are a funny thing.

I was given the opportunity to share my journey this past week with a group of girls that will always have a huge chunk of my heart.

As we swapped stories, wept and laughed together, I noticed a common theme.

“I use to think I didn’t have a story.”

“I’m still in the middle of my testimony.”

“I’ve never shared my testimony with anyone.”

So, I’ve now shared my testimony ONCE, but everyone knows my words sound better coming from my hands than from my mouth. Let’s get started.

My parents are both amazing people. Amazing, but in different ways. When I was two they decided they could probably do life better without each other and they were right. I have amazing stepparents, 2 stepsisters and 2 stepbrothers that I never would have been blessed with if my parents had stayed together. I consider myself fortunate to be apart of a blended family.

My reaction to my parents divorce was similar to any other only child. I acted out for attention, I longed to find where I could really belong and I learned to guard my heart for all the wrong reasons.

I didn’t want many friends growing up, because friends could leave and hurt you. I didn’t want to talk about my feelings because that meant letting people see the real me and I wasn’t even sure who that was. I hung out with kids way older than me and my behavior was so bad that I won’t even mention give the Devil the satisfaction of mentioning it.

This is not a story of failure or rejection. This is a story of grace and redemption.

Growing up in the Bible Belt means that I have heard every Christ like, inspirational saying that you can think of. If God will bring you to it, God will bring you through it. Have you prayed about it as much as you have talked about it? Walk by faith not by sight. Have faith in God’s timing. If God closes a door, praise Him in the hallway. These are all so encouraging until you find yourself staring at the storm that has become your life.

After I asked God into my heart and was baptized on my ninth birthday I convinved myself that I had done my part. I went through all the motions; I showed up at church and prayed when I felt like it and thought that made me a good Christian. God blessed me over and over again and I continued to take the credit for His work.

You know that friend that only calls on you only when they need something? Everyone has one… You can show them how much you care but they only return calls when they want something. Well, I was that friend. God loved me and took care of me, but I only said my prayers when I needed something from God. The worst part? I didn’t see anything wrong with it.

I spent my high school and college years dating guys that could never love me the way I needed. No matter how wonderful they thought I was or how often they told me they loved me, it was never going to be enough. The hole inside my heart longed for an unearthly need. I went from relationship to relationship, pushing guys away and getting mad when they actually retreated. Each breakup left me feeling like a failure and worried that I would never find a guy that could complete me. Where was my Jerry Maguire??

At the age of 23 I had a wonderful job waiting for me in my hometown when I graduated from college. I moved home the day after graduation. I had a family to help me start my new post-graduate life and a new boyfriend that I was absolutely crazy about. I was checking off all the social norms that every 20-something should do. I had my life all figured out and everything I wanted was in MY control and in MY grasp, just the way I liked it. I was busy being happy; I became so absorbed with my new adult life that my spiritual relationship took a back seat to material and earthly things. The comical thing is, our path doesn’t come with the joy that God’s path does. It should come as no surprise that all of these new, entertaining things in my life slowly started to stretch those big gapping holes in my heart, leaving me more empty than ever.

Fast-forward two years, we’ll get right to the good stuff.

Shortly after my 25th birthday, the longing for love and peace that I knew I wasn’t going to find on Earth could no longer be ignored. God had been knocking at my door and it was time for me to open up my heart to the right man. I reached out, joined a bible study, found myself surrounded with beautiful ladies to answer my questions, pray for me and help me nurture my relationship with God that I had always wanted.

As I begun down God’s path the light that He was shining into my life was so bright that it was blinding. I was praying to thank God for things, instead of just asking for them. I was able to start working on years of anger and resentment that had build up in my heart. I was praying for my fiancé, praying for those that I hadn’t been able to forgive. Talking to God seemed easier and the joy of following God’s path commenced to fill my heart.

Just as my relationship with God started to take off, everything around me seemed to crumble. I became sick and my doctors couldn’t seem to get to the bottom of it. My fiancé and I decided to cancel our wedding after a year of planning. Everything that I had just started to thank God for was slipping away and my newfound harmony was under attack.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10

I started to piece back together what was left of my life. Everything I had known for the last 2 years was gone. The only thing I had left was all that I needed, God.

I took a step back to assess my life, my storm, and start praising God. And boy, did that storm decided to rage on. Weeks after my canceled wedding date passed, I had an emergency MRI that revealed some abnormalities at the base of my brain near my pituitary gland that had been making me sick for over a year. When I met with my doctor the following Monday I was told I had a tumor at the base of my brain and although it was most likely benign, I would need to visit a neurosurgeon. After the tears and initial shock of my diagnosis, I was filled joy. Yes, you read that right, joy. I had been praying for answers and not only did I finally get them, I had peace about it. I had been fighting an uphill battle that I didn’t have to fight alone anymore.

Although it seemed that everything had started to go wrong, for the first time in my short life I felt that everything had started falling into place. I never imagined that seeking God would be the perfect preparation for the hardships that were just weeks away, but God knew. During all my craziness I found myself at the end of a LOT of prayers and I will forever be grateful for that.

Days before my appointment with my neurosurgeon my pastor’s wife prayed over me, prayed for my doctors and prayed for peace. Two weeks after I was informed that I had a five-millimeter tumor, I was told that I had been misdiagnosed. Getting goose bumps yet? Just like that I was told that my pituitary gland was merely enlarged and it would need nothing more than some time to heal.

Without God I would have been or would be in a very dark and sinfully pitiful place. God’s light has shown me the silver lining to these last several stormy months, and my thankful heart is what keeps me going through each and every day.

God has primed me for a season of healing. Will I still sin and fall on my face? Sure, that’s a given and it’s part of the journey. I know now that I don’t have to do it alone and I don’t have to be filled with shame when I fail, because God knows I will. God’s salvation is SO real, guys. I may be in a hallway of my life but I am worshipping waiting on my next door to open.

Part of my #MorganMakesaComeback list was to fall in love with myself. After struggling to identify myself through things, people, my career or my accomplishments, I was thrilled to finally realize in the dead of a lonely winner who I am. It also made it extremely easy to fall in love with myself… I am a princess not because I have a prince, but because my father is The King.

Forced Into Faith

I am a recovering planner.

My parents will tell you that even at a young age, I HAD to know the rundown. Where are we going and what time do we leave? What are we going to name the new puppy you just told me I couldn’t have? By the age of 15, I had my whole college career planned out.

When I made it to college I learned to turn my weakness into a strength, if I was going to be organized, I was going to be good at it. Almost every title or job description I’ve ever filled has involved the world planner.

The hardest lesson I have learned and continue to learn every single day is that my plans do not matter. I can spend hours slaving over floor plans, I can bust my brain trying to sort excel sheets but with the blink of an eye, God can change my plans. Just. Like. That.

For years I tried to fight this concept. I’ve made my head hurt trying to think days, weeks and years into the future.

Here come the verses, because it’s not a Morgan blog until I hit you with some scripture, right?

Proverbs 3:5-6 “5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

Submit is such a strong word. Merriam-Webster says submit means to accept or yield to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person. Submitting anything to anyone when you’re a planner is NOT fun. It’s stressful, it causes even more over-planning, and it can legit give me panic attacks. If I can’t lean on my own understanding, how I am suppose to accept something?? I NEED TO UNDERSTAND. Right?

I have had so much change in my life over the past six month that planning, without prayer and submission, can keep me up at night. Without God’s hope and the remembrance of His promises, the unknown can be terrifying. If you had told me eight months ago that my life was going to do a complete 180, I would have laughed at you, because it wasn’t part of my plan. Little did I know that God was giggling at me, because I wasn’t living according to His plan.

When I started to feel safe and comfortable with my plan, God forced me into faith. He forced me to abandon my plan and take slow steps onto a dimly lit path that I hadn’t even seen to begin with. SPOILER ALERT: God’s plan is so much more glorious than anything you could ever picture for yourself. Do I have rough days? Yes. Are some days full of emotions that I can’t even name? You bet. But when my mind runs wild with questions, I remember that I am more valuable than birds.

Luke 12: 22- 31 24 Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! 25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?  26 Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? 27 “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  28 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!  29 And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. 30 For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31 But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.”
Happy Friday, kids!